Wednesday, June 1, 2011

The Inner World of One Self

Ultimately, our perception is our reality. Yes, our perception is shaped by the collective society, but the way in which we are conditioned is nonetheless under the governing influence of ourselves. The social conditioning which I speak of takes form in our identification with symbols; words, ideas, concepts, etc. It is the identification with symbols, idols, and concepts that drive the separation we have with the inner voice within, for if our focus is in the mind, through the imitation of some ideal our actions become mere repetitions. Our being becomes an imitation of a thought paradigm and hence we stagnant for we loose our self in the word that we believe we are or the word that describes what we are doing. Identification with words creates a separation from our experiential experience. This separation diminishes our ability to be here Now.

In regards to the "past," we can become conditioned to believe that the words in which we use to describe a prior experience are actually who we are. We can allow our selves to hold onto certain things we find true about ourselves even when they are born of the yesterdays. This "certain thing" is the emotional energy tied up with the word or experience which we identify with. This energy, of which is a stored emotion from the past becomes your now. We can claim that we are the way you are because of what happened to us, or who our parents where, etc., etc...and this may be "true," but it is as only "true" as to the strength to which we give those convictions, those identified with conditions.

Once you assume that you "know" yourself, and you declare that there is something about you that is "real," you lock in place the perception you hold about yourself. Yet, could it be possible that we are beyond the symbols, words, concepts, and ideas we use to attribute a sense of meaning to our lives? Could it be possible that the words in which we try to assume meaning from are inherently limited in their ability to describe the experiences they are symbolized after, created after?

Furthermore when we declare that we know ourselves we are nonetheless using the past as a marker of who we are now. Yes what we have accomplished and experienced in the past becomes the energy of who we are now but there is also something about each and every one of us that escapes time. And it is this aspect of one self that escapes time that is really who we are. This aspect of oneself that is not bound to any time, or to even any experience is the absolute nature of your spirit. It is free of time in the sense that it will always exist, it always existed, and yet it exists right now. This is soul. And this the energy that is you beyond the collective emotional build-up of your past experiences.

Ultimately it is our choice that dictates whether or not our mental and spiritual energy gives heed to the collective energy of the past. Yes, the past is what it was, but it was, it is now no longer. So how can the words of the past touch the vastness of the now, of which is beyond words, for it is constantly taking shape, constantly becoming defined?

In regards to the past traumas and ills of our lives, they remain if we decide to leave the stone of our unresolved energy alone. If we use words and symbols, ideals and idols, to meander our perception around the things we wish to leave unobserved we become more entranced by our conditions, more repetitive in our actions, and we subsequently become more attached to mental identity forms we cannot come to move away from. For how are we to move away from the things we believe we are if we cannot move away from identifying with words and ideas? The past now an idea. The past may have left an energy residue that hinders your joy, but it is our identification with this energy, our identification with the words and ideas of that energy that either keep it alive and conscious to us or alive and unconscious [for words cannot touch what is conscious]. Yet, in either case, the "pain body" is alive.

Yes we must look, but be afraid not, for your past cannot inherently hurt you,...that is unless you choose it too...It seems "plausible" that sometimes we must unconsciously choose to first experience the pain, which in turn creates the need for our defenses. Yet, from a long term perspective, this enables the experience of, what it is to know experientially, the birthing of the "new self."

[did your emotion react in anyway to this; why not observe that if so...
also note how I said "your emotion:" implying that it is your creation...]

If we can look and honor whatever it is that comes up in us we allow for life experience to come through with our psychological defenses diminished. When the defenses are down we inherently accept the "what is." But how do we do this?

Defenses become as aspect of our intra-psychic reality that influences our perception of things by filtering the way our emotional body witnesses the world. Our "emotional body" becomes the reservoir of our consciousness, for consciousness is our spirit. Spirit is what enables consciousness to be and express itself through the physical body.

Our consciousness, our spirit, may be closed off to certain "avenues" of intra-psychic expression because we circumvent our conscious energy away from aspects of self that we hide from. The thing is that the aspects of self which we do not like, the aspects of self that are tucked away and hidden, are there. They are always there. They are just hidden. Yet, they are only hidden in the sense that they are unconscious to us. They nonetheless "occupy" psychic room in the inner workings of our spirit; for everything, that being the totality of our lives as well as the life of the universe, is known by spirit. And if the spirit is potential is inevitably everything.

To know spirit, to know thyself, on a deeper level one must let go of the "old karma" that is weighing them down, keeping the conditioned body unchanged, and keeping us living within the boundaries of the same defenses. To do that we must ultimately accept, but to accept we first must "purge" the emotion(s) that are withheld in spirit and which are unconscious to us [Remember: because spirit is inevitable everything].

To do this we must witness "it" [it being the "hidden"], be aware of it, and walk into it. Our emotions will come up as they do, but why not experience this with courage and have faith in the notion that whatever it is that is coming up is not to be ashamed of or judged as an inferior aspect of self in anyway? For we will see that these "old aspects of you" are what enable you to know yourself the way you inevitably want to know yourself.

Purge the emotional bodies that are constructing fictitious boxes around the inevitable expansion of our awareness. Remove the conditioning of the "thought paradigm" you witness all around you. Remove the tension that conditioned life has instilled upon you.

That tension is the spirit saying to body that there is disharmony present. In this case the spirit is trying to tell mind and body that there is an experience that is occurring that is "out of the line" with the natural order of things. The more we evolve consciously we become more sensitive to harsh realities of our day. Which may in turn build even greater tension within the mind and body of someone.

There are "breaking points" were our unconsciousness becomes so pressing that it forces, sometimes by "accident," our life into upheaval so we are forced to make changes. Yet, honor these upheavals. For anything you experience you should honor...why not honor your life? But more importantly than all...forgive yourself...always. Do what you need to to. Be "crazy" and do what your impulses call for, but why not direct these impulses [and be conscious of ourselves instantaneously] in a way that honors your life, not damages it.

Jump in the cold ocean and scream with fits of furry if you feel. Do whatever it is to allow yourself to love yourself enough to forgive the past that haunts you. Release the stored physical energy of, what Eckhart Tolle refers to as, the "pain body," in any way that feels passionate to your being.

Allow yourself to release your past through "careful catharsis:" careful in the sense that you know it is right in your heart not to hurt you or anyone else around you. For you know, in your feeling of love for oneself, that your rage will seize, your past will be forgiven, and you will come to know a "new" you. A you that moves beyond the past by living in the Now...

And to live in the Now, fully, we need to let go of the chains of our conditioned past. By allowing yourself to forgive those who have hurt you and subsequently "changed" your life, you ultimately alter your perception of things and you open yourself up to a higher aspect of yourself. You experience your self in a lighter fashion. You become of a higher, more ethereal vibration.

I guess the experience of going the deepest into now brings us to the point where experience becomes everything and we become immersed into something way beyond our being [this is "God-Realization;" or closer to knowing the "God experience", for God is always evolving too {this is the same movement that runs through us, and the same way in which we come to know thyself}].

The work to be done now, by enabling ourselves to drop our defenses [of which were put in place, by the choosing of our own soul, so that we could experience higher aspects of oneself through experiential catharsis and subsequent perception expansion] we again, move into higher, more realized, versions of one self.

[our expansion into the now: our ability to go into deeper moments of the now both in an intra- and inter psychic manor is thwarted when we label our selves in ways, or "know" things about "who we are." The ideas we have about ourselves are essentially who we are, but our self forgiveness and our self understanding will grow when those ideas no longer limit oneself to perceive oneself beyond the analytical and rational creations of the thought realm. Is maybe "who we think we are" our shield from coming to know the sense of self beyond all these concepts and ideas? This I am not particularly sure of, for we are all different, but I know that it is true that the longer we stay "inside" the ideas of who we think we are the more distanced we become from actually being able to "change." When we change we do indeed stay the same [for we are always our essence but we do nonetheless grow. We move into the now more so of our "emotional presence."

That "Emotional Presence" is your soul.

And again, when we step into soul, we step into the deeper reality of our own inner world. When we step into deeper experiences of the now we step deeper into the womb of reality, into the womb of Earth and the Cosmos. For we are understanding, experientially, what life is all about...Expanding consciously, the Emotional Presence of Self.

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