Tuesday, April 26, 2011
What we value is inherently subjective. Yet I feel that what the soul wants is universal. The desires of the soul manifests itself in a unique way dependent upon the conditions of someones life situation. Yet desire is still present. What is this desire? Is the desire an "existential" one? Does the soul simply want to understand itself? And what is a better way for the soul to do this other than to create in harmony within the movement of love... Too call forth those aspects of love from deep within to make them made manifest in the present moment. We can do this in our everyday actions with ourselves and with others, with plants, with animals, and with water for that matter. Love is not a thing, it is an experience. Can you not feel the reflection of yourself in the admiration of your hearts desire? Love is an eternal movement, for it is always taking shape and transforming into higher, more divine, forms of itself. This is the mirror of the soul, the mirror of the cosmos...and it is through this reflective process that the soul comes to know itself and know what it is that it is desiring.
Essentially the impulse of the soul is driven by love. How so? Well look at all of our actions...they are all based out of love...even our "hateful" actions...the ones that are done out of fear, division, and malice are in some way done out of passion. And it is passion that is the impulse that pushes the experience of love into existence. Yet, often times, we act passionately out of fear and we seek to hoard what we fear to lose. We may fear to loose love with a person so we act in a way that manipulates them, or control them. We may fear that we are going to loose our "wealth," so we seek to hoard it in this game we call "survival of the fittest." Wars are started this way too...it is because we fear to loose what we love that hatred may come to be. Yet look here...have we not than contorted love into fear...are they not two sides of the same coin?
Everything is done because people believe that it is right (no matter what it is). Fear is justified in the minds of those who honor it for they feel that they will become "less than" they are without what it is that they identify with. This is where the ego has the power to turn love into fear...harmony into dissonance. The ego can take the mask as "passion" (that is if passion is to be controlled by the fearful mind) yet this passion is subjective to the person.
Regardless, it is passion that is the impulse for the person to express what it is they think they feel. There is no "right" and no "wrong." All things just are, but remember...choosing how to express ones life should be done in a way to whereas the person listens to the calling in there soul without the filter of the mind...it is then that they are in touch with what is divine...it is then that the individual (who essentially is an essence of the divine soul) comes to know oneself...it is than that no acts of malice, greed, hatred, and fear can exist. For the language of the soul is the desire of God (God being you, I , and the All). And would the seat of creation...that being the all, have a passion to see its own creation live out the disharmony of division, inequality, and dissociation of itself through identification with the illusory mind?
It is important to realize that to think and too feel are two different things. The mind is what creates all the division in the world, the mind is what breeds hate...and it is the mind that confuses the message of the soul. So listen not to the mind and listen instead to that silent voice inside...it may be difficult to hear it...so quiet your mind, breathe, and relax...take yourself away from the things that weigh you down by simply stepping aside from them. Allow your mind to run rampant, but pay it no mind attention (realize that these thoughts are just temporary conditions). Simply focus on the breathe entering and leaving your body...maybe than you will feel something you never have felt before...maybe than you will feel what your soul really values...what you really value...
If we than are in touch with that silent place within...is there any room for the mind to create division between you and I (for all division and the social institutions created around those divisions: the ways of conventional economy, religious institutions, and the like)? And without division...have we not found peace? Again, it seems to me that Peace, Love, and Truth are interchangeable...
Monday, April 25, 2011
"Seeking enlightenment for oneself is egotistical. True enlightenment occurs when all of mankind is enlightened." - Michael St. Clair
I want to clarify and expand on some points that Michael St. Clair brought up here. Firstly, his emphasis that enlightenment is only a group experience, exemplifies the "oneness" nature of all of existence. The "oneness" experience may be felt individually, but it will not be sustained (on a very deep level) until it is felt by the general mass. Mankind in itself is one entity.
At this point in time our cumulative actions are, for the most part, directed by a dominant paradigm. Yes, different parts of the world function in different ways, but at the end of the day our similarities are more prominent than our cultural differences. More than that, we are all living a life that is controlled, to some degree, by the world bank and the elite that impose economic, judicial, and social "sanctions" on the general population.
For the most part we all function under western economic principles. Except for a few indigenous tribes, that still live in harmony with our planet, we have on a collective level devised a society that honors particular principles that dispose "seperationism." We still live by "survival of the fittest" principles. We are governed by rules that prioritize monopolized profits of general wellness. Although I feel that we can possibly change the system from in the inside out through direct democracy [events like the occupy movement]. But living in the midst of an economic system that thrives off of never ending profit and never ending growth leaves me to believe that the only way through this mess is through unity. Yeah, that simple old principle. The industrial military complex attempts to strangle us in fear, pining each other against each other. But only when we realize how important our unity is comes the day when we will see past the illusory strong hold that the elite have over this world. Why not peer into the mind....and see where this illusion started to begin with....
We separate ourselves with ideas...you are a Christian, I am a Muslim...you are rich, I am poor. And so on. These cultural dogmas upkeep the status-quo, which perpetuates separation. Now if we are psychologically separated through adhering to our social institutions, do we not play out the same separated relationship with the Earth. Typically, what we produce from the inside becomes our reality on the outside and if we are thinking and acting from a place of adhered too "separatism" we must believe we are separated from the Earth. Therefore the feeling of experiential oneness, in a collective state, is not occurring under the current paradigm. Now, are their consequences to this?
Our Science, has for quite some time now, has discovered the effects of our interactions with the Earth (given our current way of being). Our inner reality has created an outer reality to whereas we are out of balance with the ways of the Earth. We demand more from the Earth than the Earth can supply us with. And the insatiable ways of the ego...its ability to separate us from one another and the endless desires that it perpetuates (due to an existential void that it creates) has created an outer world to whereas we are running a society that is "unsustainable" (not in sync with the movements of the Earth). Again, the inner reality has caused this outer reality.
This is not to say their is not enough resource that we are to be provided with to ensure our survival...yet there is not enough for an ego inflated populous which is taught to derive its satisfactions from the hoarding of material, of which happens to be unsustainably acquired. Mankind than, as one entity, is dissociated from the Earth because we have lost communication with our own inner sixth sense. The ego keeps us within our minds and cut off from our ability to function beyond mind...into realms deeper than we can currently experience. The ego quiets our ability to communicate from soul level, and it takes soul communication to empathize with the ALL, with the human race, with the Earth.
What is enlightenment than really? Of course enlightenment is not something that can be understood in the mind. There is no IQ test for enlightenment and even in my experiences some of the most enlightened entities that I have come across have not been that "academically intelligent" (for in their hearts they had a knowing to move away from conventional teachings for they knew, without even thinking, that these conventional teachings were detached from spirit). I know we have all come across "enlightened beings." Those are the people who are awoken to their inner feeling reality. The thing is, if one does not go within they can not understand the outer reality in its entirety. The reason for this is that the outer reality is understood through the inner experience. The outer reality becomes manifest through our inner relation to it (and it is our degree of "going within" that produces a conscious society or an unconscious society - too not go within, you go without). And if our current inner relation to the outer reality goes unsensed (to a large varying degree) becuase we submit to a cultural authority that is prescribed to us than how are we going to manifest an outer reality that is consciously our own, that is enlightened, and that is not just a creation of those "in power."
---------------Back to Observing "Enlightenment"---------------
Individual entities (individual people) can be "enlightened," it is just they do not think about it. They do not see themselves as enlightened for they know that they are not their thoughts, not their ego identifications and the like. They are the "oneness." Yes they can understand the illusion of their individuality, yet they know that on an absolute level that they are the grandeur, the oneness, the all. So essentially, if someone declares to you that they are enlightened they are rather confused to what enlightenment means. To be enlightened is a humbling experience for it takes you away from your ego. In this sense there is no confirmation to "know" if you are enlightened. It is just a state that simply is...nothing more. So if we keep striving to become "enlightened" we will never become the energy which the word tries to describe.
Rather instead on focusing to become "enlightened" it is important we focus on making the practical implications of the oneness realization. This will bring the society into an "enlightened" state, and from there we may experience experientially the collective enlightenment through our own individual experiences (I think this is what St. Clair was trying to talk about). The thing is, if the majority of people are still asleep to the notion that all is one...if the majority of people still identify and function through ego identification our society will remain "unenlightened"...and the movement of spiritual awakening will slow.
Can "enlightenment" for an individual truly exist if the society is not itself enlightened. The thing is...in a way it can, yet for it to be fully realized it needs to be a collective experience. A person can be of dual nature...that is they can understand experientially both living through the ego and living through the oneness. This is an important undertaking pre-2012 and beyond era. For when we know both how the ego functions and how the oneness feels we can "bridge the gap" between being an unconscious society (an "unenlightened" society) to a conscious society (enlightened society). We will also be undergoing a cosmic influence that pushes our boundaries as to what we thought we are, what we thought we are doing on this planet, and what our purpose was in this existence. To me this is what 2012 is all about it. It is not the end of time (the end of days)...but it is the end of "time" (the end of clock time and the illusory reality that it creates). No doubt there are Earth Changes ahead...but in the words of St.Clair..."If we know our future...can we change it?" Can we realize our purpose by seeing how the future is shaping out to be? Or will we continue to submit to a reality that is prescribed to us. A reality that perpetuates the illusion, the divide, and all of the effects that come with separation?
The words I write before you, to me, are in no way depressing. For it is an existential realization that brings greater harmony in our own lives. And we first must witness the inner reality to really witness the outer reality.
Yet there is something I am witnessing. There is a movement going on here, especially with the younger generations. People are beginning to realize the unconsciousness and the separation that the current system prescribes. Their is an inner build up of awareness that people are beginning to witness from within. They may not know how to put words on this...but there is tension building...for the soul knows what needs to unfold. So because the inner aspect of our being is realizing that it is not nourished it will push you, and the world, to become unified and at peace...even if that means completely flipping your life upside down.
It is the spark that starts the fire (the transformation), but it is the sustaining fuel source that allows the fire to happen. The momentum generated from the planetary awakening is that sustaining fuel...yet, it is the moment in ones life where he or she must choose to see "truth" or stay unconscious that defines how the monumental changes ahead of us will affect their life. 2012 and beyond is that the spark...
Saturday, April 23, 2011
Our feelings can, at times can bring us ecstatic joy, but during other times they can also be a lot to bare. No matter what we are feeling it is best advised to sit with them, be with them and not run away or distract ourselves from them. There is often a message from the divine in these feelings - yet don't always expect this "message" to be something that is instantly understood. It can be a lifetime before we understand, conceptually, what it was that the universe was trying to tell us (you have to understand that the universe does not know time, becuase essentially there is no time, except for the measurements adhered too in the mind).
If we cloud our selves in distractions, if we numb ourselves with intoxicants (drugs and alcohol), over consume material (excessive eating, excessive shopping), or dissociate from our feelings by over indulging in escapist activities (excessive television, internet exploration, a reliance on tomorrows, vacations, etc) we hide from the emotions that are sitting in the seat of our souls. We can "stuff" these emotions, however unwanted, into the back of our unconscious, where they are out of sight out of mind...but they still linger within us and actually lower our ability to resonate at a higher level of conscious awareness. It takes a lot of psychic energy to store unwanted emotions in the unconscious body. And the reason why they lower our ability to resonate at a higher conscious awareness is becuase when our energy is stored in the unconscious reservoir of our being we operate, more so, from a reactive stance.
I understand your escape, for I have, at times, escaped like anyone else. To sit with the energy that feels unwanted is simply troubling. Yet escapism only clogs our conscious awareness...and these troubling feelings take root in our unconscious reservoir. We are more prone to reaction than, as opposed to conscious behavior, becuase we have a limited scope of perception. Just like the clogged artery that can not transport blood as easily, neither can the reactive mind transport consciousness from the soul into the body. We become reactive becuase our awareness first needs to pass through the unconscious filter that has accumulated these troubled emotions. This is what Eckhart Tolle refers to as the emotional pain body. This "emotional pain body" can severely affect our conscious awareness and make us more reactive for in our reaction (living life on auto-pilot) we bypass the troubles that are weighing us down. Our defenses allow us to function, however from a reactive state (and do we not see any correlation between the majority of us being in a sleep state and the perpetuation of Earth destruction, human destruction, and the like?).
The more defensive we are the more bottled up we are...and the more bottled up we are the more reactive we are...the cycle builds...But is 2012 our release? Because it is becoming clear to me that more people are having existential breakdowns than ever before (and more people more than ever before are becoming emotionally desensitized and affectually closed off)...yet for those who are breaking down you are choosing to SEE. This breakdown, however troubling, awakens us to the ONENESS REALIZATION. We can only heal ourselves and the world when we realize this.
Back to the inner experience:
We may even have a calm mind during these troubling times. We may even know exactly what is going on, yet the body is feeling tense, anxious and the like. The body may be in a depressed state. But what is important that we do, that is if we want to move beyond and transcend...to evolve consciously through these experiential undertakings...is to "digest" these feelings. And one can do this in any way that allows them to be present. Some may want to meditate, some may want to walk, others may want to communicate through written or spoken word, either in solitude, or with others. Some may want to create music or art that portrays these feelings. This "release" is "digestion" for it allows us to transcend these feelings for we are accepting them through the declaration of their existence. It is our preference how we "digest" and there is no right way, But in order to really move beyond the feelings that have us in a troublesome state, it is important to "walk through" them..."digest them" so that they are understood (not necessarily conceptually)...and subsequently evolve consciously. [Remember, consciousness does not necessarily mean that we have too know something conceptually...we can be conscious of something...we can "know" something, and yet not know how to put words to it].
Consciousness and sensitivity are in many ways two branches of the same limb. Sensitivity is an experience by which we sense the inner and outer stimulus of our human experience. Consciousness is an awareness of both the inner and outer human experience. The more sensitive we become the greater our capacity to be conscious is. For conscious awareness is like a light in the dark...the more sensitive we become...the more we illuminate around us...the more we see and sense the ALL that is around us. And for those who are becoming increasingly sensitive to the world around them they are beginning to feel the "weight" of the world.
Essentially, if we always were sensitive to everything that was going on there would be no need for "transformation" and this movement into the new dimension (as we move into and out of the year 2012) would be an "easy" one. Yet it has been our collective apathy, our collective unconscious build up of suppressed emotions and energy that is making this transition (2012) a particularity heavy one in the spectrum of universal awakening.
The light bearers (who potentially, can be anyone who chooses to see the light, the all, etc), are now feeling feelings so heavy. They are, at times (like now during the Mercury Retrograde: http://www.alphalifetrends.com/mercuryretrograde.html), digesting feelings for many instead of just themselves...this is what is meant to feel like you have the weight of the world on your shoulders.
So too all you sensitive ones out there...know that you are brave, know that you are strong, know that this is your destiny...for in your experiential undertaking you will come to know the what IS. You will know experientially what collective and individual transformation is to a very serious degree. Remember nothing is random...The dichotomy exists that this transition did not to be as heavy...yet here we are at the crossroads of infinite possibility...what will you do? Run and hide from the feelings that have you down, or choose to own them, feel them, and congregate with like minds? Because when those of the light choose to come together, their light, their consciousness is magnified. Essentially, the "transition" that is occurring now will not be done alone, but rather it will be done collectively. Yet it is up to all of us to lend our hands, even to those who loath in the rewards reaped through the destruction of the human mind and the Earth, and come together in the "ONENESS realization." But remember, all you can do is lend a hand...you cannot expect anyone to take it.
Have a faith, a "knowing" that these feelings are for the betterment of your spiritual awakening. Remember there is nothing random going on here. Everything that is occurring, everything!, is for you! So awaken to the knowing that your experiences are a gift, even if they are unwanted, even if they are hideous, for life and our experiences are the gifts which enable soul to experience life beyond concepts. To be alive is a gift...so have faith that these feelings and these experiences are just for you...Have faith that you have the courage to get through them. In fact you inherently have the courage, you are inherently "strong" enough for anything you experience. It is soul...it is the divine, that brought you into contact with whatever it is your experiencing. Soul, the seat of creation, would not have brought you anything which you can't handle. Because even in the wake of death you can handle anything...for the soul is forever.
Sunday, April 17, 2011
The conversation is never ending. There is no start or beginning to this conversation. You can either participate in this conversation or you can ignore it, but whether we are conscious of it or not...the conversation preservers. We often tend to think that "conversations" only exist between humans, but the world is constantly "communicating" with us. Yet we are conditioned to observe life within a scope that is limiting, for we "believe" that the universe must be logical, and must act within its biological limitations.
But believe not what you believe and instead step into the awareness of knowing that what you observe is greater than what you think your observing...
Step into the awareness of knowing that what you sense transcends what you are actually thinking...for what we experience, observe, and sense is tied to something that is inextricably conscious, alive, and available for two way communication. The thing though about this conversation is that it is not something that "happens to you," it is something you consciously participate in (whether we are aware of it or not). When we drop the distraction of the ego, we can begin to witness that "thing" which transcends you...The "thing" being the feeling of self during the "act of awareness." - this is when allow feeling and soul to lead us instead of letting the mind lead us.
What conversation am I even talking about? Well I am speaking about the infinitely unfolding conversation that is going on between you (the internal world) and the universe (the external world). You may ask, "how does something that has no ability to talk have the ability to communicate." Well, this is a thought that directly reflects the way in which we have been conditioned to observe how communication can happen. You may ask "how is something that is not alive communicate." Aliveness is also another relative term based on how we have been conditioned. Aliveness, as we believe it to be, is a term used to describe an entity of existence that is biologically alive. Yet, universally speaking, everything is alive because everything is conscious. Everything is conscious because it is inextricably tied to the ALL. And the ALL, the realm of the all encompassing expansion of infinite consciousness, is not divided. The only thing that divides anything, conceptually speaking, in our reality is thought (read the meta-physics of consciousness to better understand this). So essentially if everything is related; that is, if everything is is inherently relating to everything, how then is everything not in communication? It is through this communication that consciousness comes to witness itself and understand itself in the varying degrees and dimensions to which consciousness reveals itself to itself. It is hard to describe this, but consciousness builds itself, expands itself, through becoming aware of itself. And through this communication, we as individual human units of consciousness evolve for we are brought into a heightened state. We evolve because we are doing the only thing we ever came here to do...and that was to witness ourselves...and the more conscious we become of consciousness it self, of the conversation, of the world, of everything...the more conscious we become of our nature, for we realize that we ARE nature.
Verbal exchange is not the only way to communicate. In actuality it is a very limiting way of communication because words can not touch the actual experience of the word being spoke about. A word, a thought, a concept, which are the means of verbal communication are abstractions. They are not the actual "thing." The actual thing is the experience. The experience being the feeling evoked from whatever it is that the observer comes into relation with. True communication, in its most elemental and pure form, stems from feeling. And words, thoughts, and concepts are often used in attempt to convey these feelings, but do not get tied up and lost in the fact that these words are not the actual thing. Communication essentially takes place in the realm of feelings. And if we become conscious of how the exterior world evokes feelings within us we can begin to realize that we can have a two way conversation with the exterior reality. I will explain what I mean by this in detailed examples below*. So now that we are clear that communication extends way beyond words can we begin to "taste," experientially, how everything around us is communicating with us. We are in relation to everything. The interior world can only come to know itself through the witnessing of our relation to the outside world. This is the foundation of communication. Communication exists in the meeting spot between the internal world and the external world because this is where feeling is created...
The feelings we feel occur because of our experience with the exterior. We are always communicating with the exterior. Do not doubt the ability for us to foster feelings from within that communicate with the exterior world. Do not doubt then to have these feelings reciprocated by the exterior world. There is nothing "random," going on here. Everything we witness in our conventional society is the outcome of our communication with the outside world. Yet, many of our actions, many of our creations never take into account the well-being of the inhabitants and the earth itself. Because of this we are beginning to witness the effects of this in how the Earth and its inhabitants are communicating with us. It is not random that there has been an increase in tectonic activity, an increase in socio-political upheaval and the like. We are now witnessing the Earth communicate back against our own ignorance by the Earth cleansing itself of the entities that are ignorant to its means of communication. Would you continue talking to someone who was not listening to you? Or would you walk away?
The Earth right now is walking away...but we still have the opportunity to walk away with it...and we shall for that is our destiny. But where are we walking? Is walking then, metaphorically speaking, the same as evolving? Here the Earth has realized that the general mass that occupies it is a sleep at the wheel and is veering off course. Our ignorance perpetuates a divided world that hoards and destroys the vital life force to which not only humans depend, not only animals and plants depend on, but the Earth itself depends on. And so the Earth is choosing to evolve by transcending its dense 3 dimension vibration (a vibration that enables duality to exits - and everything that has ensued through egoic ignorance) into a 4th and subsequent 5th dimensional being where it can restore its vitality and move closer into the oneness (away from duality). This is a shift of metaphysical proportions and is occurring, not coincidentally with the shift that the Mayans were keen on. Regardless of our ignorance thought, we are always "walking back to source"...the walking process is always happening, always occurring...our conscious awareness of this "walking journey" though, dictates how "fast" we walk...how "fast" we evolve into the body of divine source. So it is our conscious awareness that can shape our choices...the choices that shape the momentum and direction of our evolution. Remember, not choosing is a choice. And it is the not-choice choice that has perpetuated a mass mind that is a sleep at the wheel, distracted and dissociated through its own egoic distractions.
It just occurred to me I don't feel emotionally well during full moons...This is my time to exponentially experience the culmination of this cycles' emotional energy buildup (cycle meaning time in between full moon cycles). Yet, it is quite intense this time around...and increasing so...I think it is because I sense the lack of communication between humans and the earth (yet it is a disconnect that was inevitable. The disconnect will bring us to the realization of connection - but when will we choose to understand this and connect?). Most of us are immune to this, or we "choose" to be immune to it (for we are distracted and dissociated from the conversation going on with reality due to how perversely we live from mind instead of soul). Again, through this non-choice choice we are unconsciously creating, or perpetuating, a reality that condones inequality, competition instead of cooperation, destruction, war, brutality, and an overall disconnection with spirit.
Spirit is there! it always is...it just much be reached for in order for us to experience soul...we must consciously strive and arrive at soul....and continue to move towards goodness in the spiritual form...Love, harmony, equality, peace and divine justice are only possible if we move into soul. If we are going to be brought back into communication with the earth we must be brought back into soul and feel everything that is occurring. When we feel this communication we are no longer dissociated from "the conversation" with life...with the universe...for we are no longer caught in the trap of the mind and its abstractions.
When the ego becomes "known." When we come to the dissolution of the ego through awakening we will come to experience the restoration of our connection with spirit/with earth...When we are no longer bound to the ego, no longer tethered to the mind...we will find peace. We will be in Communion...
...The conversation is then understood...
Last night I was playing guitar in my room...Had Phish Blasting, Amp Cranked... for many Hours...Last night was also a very stormy night. The storms that ragged down south (bringing massive tornadoes and subsequent upheaval) influenced our area as well...I had a clear view of the night sky through two large windows. A lighting storm was brewing...
At some point in the night I was totally lost in the music...I was not thinking about anything...I was just playing through feeling...and magically my fingers kept moving...The room around me was alive and breathing and so was everything...During the peak of a phish jam...both trey and I were raging and as this happened...in my immersion into feeling (completely) the night sky flashed purple with the evenings first observable bolt of lighting...The tension built and then released in sync with the movements of the world. I was realizing through music how much the earth responded to me. I am alive and I feel without thought when I play guitar. That communion felt ecstatic...Beyond being "proof" it was a celebration...As it always should be.
(post photo from: Ashley Coll, Fine Artist. http://www.ashleycoll.com/index.html)
Friday, April 15, 2011
I was walking down 2nd avenue today in New York on my lunch break. These busy streets always have something to observe and today was no different. I came across a man who was panhandling for money, yet this man was definitely in need of some extra care. He had a condition called hemangioma. By definition: Hemangioma a benign self-involuting tumor (swelling or growth) of endothelial cells, the cells that line blood vessels. It usually appears during the first weeks of life and resolves by age 10. I am going to spare you with an image for those who are squeamish, but look it up if you want.
The thing was this man was in his 50's. He was obviously very poor from birth and was never able to get the treatment he needed to heal his condition. He appeared to be from Central America. He spoke very little english, but you can tell by looking in his eyes that he had a very sincere message to share with whom ever crossed his path. When I gave him a few dollars he gave me a card that he had made.
It was titled: Life is an Act of Courage!
And it read:
Feeling life with its suffering is weakness; inspiring life is strength. The flower is the most symbolic visible form of that life is: Beautiful, Fragile, Ephemeral...Enjoy it! We are an instant that disappears in time; there is nothing to hide; and nothing to lose. Life is suffering becuase of its form; It is beauty becuase of its nature; and a mystery becuase of it its miracle. We have a mind so narrow that we evoke with more strength, a more insignificant offense than hundreds of received benefits. Enjoy a boy's smile and console an old person's tears. Ugliness is like the herb, beauty is like the flower, it one dries up the other withers. In essence they are the same thing.
"I Appreciate all the support that you can offer me" - Nelson Garzon
This man was obviously a very evolved spirit. He came to Earth with a condition so "hideous" that he was banished by masses and become a man hidden in the background. Yet, for those who slowed down their fast pace New York lives just for an instant and graced him with their attention they were given the opportunity to find something beautiful. They were given the opportunity to find out that life is a gift. And that no matter what your condition is there can be peace, love, and acceptance. Because I will tell you...when I gave that man some money and he gave me his card we looked each other in the eye...and all I could see was strength, courage, beauty, and a sincere calm. This exchange inspired me and made me feel grateful to be a human being sharing in this experience called life with all those around me.
Just before I walked off he put his fist on his chest and slightly and peacefully pounding his heart to express to me his gratefulness. As I walked half way down the block I teared in the bittersweet realization that I had just witnessed something very beautiful.
I was grateful for being shown an amazing example that life is what you make of it...and no matter how "ugly" things get...they are nonetheless beautiful...nonetheless fragile and ephemeral. He showed me that all is a choice. And it is in this choice that one is given the opportunity to be courageous...just like Nelson.
He was a man full of wisdom...and to me...he was an angel giving a message of love and courage for those who were ready to receive it...so thank you very much Nelson Garzon! You made my life a little bit richer.
Posted by Christopher Renzo at 10:54 PM
Friday, April 8, 2011
The thought that created the "significance" of what you see on the surface fades as you we move into unconditioned consciousness. When we witness life without the conditioned responses and feelings, without reactivity...we do not necessarily see and subsequently think about life with our eyes anymore...we feel it with our eyes. Our visions become felt at the deeper level of being as opposed to the surface level of thought. For example, the person walking down the street is not perceived as the thought(s), or conditions which we prescribe onto them. Essentially, in the depth of their being, they are undefinable (unconditional). On the surface they may be this or that, may look like this or that, may have this or that, but beyond all that superficiality (of which is born of conditioned thought) lies something greater, something deeper, something inherently divine...of which is condition-less for it is the "energy," the "movement," the commonality that connects us all. This which I speak of has no words and cannot be conceptualized in the mind. It is only something you can feel. And you can only know this, you can only know "being," when you feel it, not think it.
Thought cannot necessarily "dig deep," it can only know what things are through the conditions that the mind attributes to them (i.e., that something is "sad," that something is "good," something is "sexy," something is in "style," all of which point to the judgment that something is "different"). So the mind can only know thought; the concepts and judgments that take place in the realm of mind. Thought can not necessarily "dig deep," because it cannot go deeper than thought. This may seem obvious, but for most of the waking hours we spend the majority of our time in mind...and so we diminish our focus on the ability to perceive life through "being." And to be, to live through being, we dismiss the opportunity to attribute conditions to anything we perceive. For the feelings we feel for our experience through being triumphs that of our experience through mind for it enables us to be understanding, more clear, more in harmony with body, and overall more joyous. Feelings, in pure form (meaning they are untainted by the filtering mind), are evoked from within us in a "meditative" state...and usually these unconditioned feelings have the tendency to guide us from the dark into the light for this is the will of all of creation. Because moving into the light...moving into love...moving being into harmony with the what is...moves us into harmony with source. For source is something to feel not something we think. And we can only be guided by something we are connected to. And we can only connect to source through feeling.
When we live from a state of being we are enabled to sense in our immediate environment what is of the dark and what is of the light (or in another way, what are activities, or things we witness and perceive, that are born of unconsciousness or that of consciousness). Source is inherently conscious, for source is the realized and manifested potential of the ALL. Source is that which is consciousness...that which is realized. Yes the ALL also harbors the unconscious (for the ALL is the ALL, the EVERYTHING), but it is the unconscious which is not realized just yet by the ALL and subsequently not made manifest by source. The ALL (meaning everything; all aspects of creation; you, me, the stone, the feeling of love, the galaxy etc.) is always moving up the "upward spiral of illuminated light"...The all is always moving into consciousness...yet the source energy...that which guides us into higher dimensions of conscious perception is already realized, is already conscious. [As a side note...for something to be "realized" does not mean that it has to be manifest in physical form, it just means that it is something that can be felt at the level of being...and anything that we feel can potentially guide us]. And so being, the state of unconditional existence, the state of blissful attention to source, the sense of self that is guided not by thought, but by feeling, is constantly evolving and constantly becoming more aware of itself...Essentially this is the basis of consciousness evolution and this is how we become conscious by living in line with source. Yes the unconscious eventually makes its way to become source energy, but source (you and I and everything potentially conscious) must become aware of itself...again this is consciousness evolution through being. Because to live in source, to live in the consciousness that is already made manifest enables the unconsciousness to seep into realization and become conscious (through "awareness osmosis"). But when we live in mind, when we live in conditions, we are unconscious to the evolution of consciousness...to the ability to expand consciousness...for we stay in a state that stagnates with past: because all conditions are of the past. Source is inherently in the NOW. And source can only evolve (meaning that the unconscious becomes conscious, that the unknown becomes known) when aspects of existence (humans in this case) are conscious...when aspects of existence are open and receptive.
It seems that true "consciousness" has nothing to do with thinking. It has everything to do with awareness. For awareness is unconditional...and has nothing to do with judgment. And it is this feeling of guidance from source that allows one to see the superficiality of mind all around us as it is manifested in the consumer society, in the image society, in the ego society, of the divided society, and allow it to fade away. This is when we are truly united with our awareness and the other entities of existence that cross our path. This is when we can also truly see another, and truly empathize with another. This is what enables us not only to be "psychic" to our own lives, but also "psychic" to the feelings of another. THIS IS WHEN YOU WILL TRULY SEE ANOTHER. For we wont necessarily see life with our eyes anymore...we will feel it with our eyes.
Posted by Christopher Renzo at 9:54 AM
Monday, April 4, 2011
Essentially there is no pressure to become who you want to be except for the pressures of which originate in the mind. Because we often tend to live through the mind; meaning we experience life through thought, abstraction, and projection, we tend to forget that there is a silent space within us that is inherently separate from this process. For there is a place within us that operates beyond what the mind understands. There is a place within us that already knows the wholeness not only of our own existence, but of existence in general. It goes without much saying that we are always moving into grander and more "realized" aspects of who we are...we are always growing and coming to know this "wholeness' to a greater experiential degree...we are always expanding (just as the universe does), but we are never departing from who we are when we grow. We are never person A becoming person B. Often times the mind will led us to believe that we need to become something different to become who we are destined to become, what we sense we should become. For how are we to be something different if we do not apply a directed change? How are we to be different if we are not transforming in to person "B"?
It is the ego, the creation of the mind, which leads us to believe that we are already not whole, already not person "B." Because the mind cannot see the person you are becoming. It is an experiential process...not something we are going to understand through mind. Yet it is the mind which puts a tremendous amount of pressure on us to become something that we are not just yet.
Essentially the mind does not know who we are because it is the mind that grounds its knowledge of the self in abstractions. This is not to say to disregard the mind, for often it can help us decipher our feelings and the like, but when the mind is used as a means to know oneself, too feel one self (through the thoughts) than we become "lost" because we become the embodiment of the abstractions. Remember, everything we think, do, or sense, is creative. And abstractions are nothing more than conceptual tangents of the reality that is more than a conceptualization. And so to base our understanding of self in our abstractions takes us away from what we actually are...which is the aspect of being that is beyond definition. Because think about it...can you really use words to define the entirety of your being?
The abstractions divide us from our state of being, our sensing self. This is the aspect of self that knows we are moving into what we are destined to become. It is the mind that puts pressure on us now, because in this "division" (when we live through abstractions) their is an existential void that is created...for we feel that we are not good enough because the abstractions, of which we identify with, communicate to us that we are not _______ (fill in the blank). So essentially we do not feel good because we have denied to ourselves the knowing that we are wonderful and perfect just as we are now. Yet we try to remedy this existential void by creating, at the "low" end, distractions that disable us from being aware that we have created this existential void to begin with, or at the "high" end by creating "goals" for ourselves to become something better. However noble the idea is to become "better," it inherently misleads us, for it divides from the knowing within that we are already whole...and that we are just moving into grander realizations of this wholeness...
The mind can bring us to a clearer understanding of who we are becoming in this moment of now through its analysis...but it cannot know who we are, or who we are becoming down the road. Only the heart, the soul, the feeling aspect of us knows who we are. Realize here the difference between understanding and knowing. A knowing is absolute, whereas an understanding is an abstraction of the "knowing." What is a "knowing?" A knowing is a feeling. It is just simply something you know...and it needs no verification. Usually the conditioned mind, and its creation the ego, question these knowings, doubt these knowing and declare that their way of functioning (via thought and ego identification) should have supreme reign over being..."for it understands better." But the mind is just as temporal as being...and only can decode experience through the limited system of words and concepts. Please do not get me wrong, the mind is a beautiful thing, for it is allowing me to use concepts and words to transcribe to you what a state of being is that is beyond words and concepts, yet it can often times be a trap...for often times it is the only way of being that we come to know.
We often abdicate the sensing self, for the thinking self. In this divide we put a greater emphasis on thought...when in their communion (between thought and being) thought is used for being...instead of now in our contemporary way of being (as influenced by the norms of society), where thought is used to understand and sensations are questioned. Primarily, we are caught up in the ego...and what this does is it steers us away from knowing who we are. Because it is the egos means of survival to declare that it knows reality more so than the sensation aspect of who we are...yet in reality the ego can only understand the sensation through abstractions. The ego is fleeting and is not grounded in the present reality, not grounded in the NOW. And only in the NOW can we sense, can we feel who we are. Thinking is a time out...Feeling is a time-in...So therefore if we are to grow, if we are to become something we are not right now...why think about it...why have the ego judge it? Why take a "time-out" to dwell in the thought of not being something we desire to be? Why not just move with it and let the rest...Because when we judge it, when we have an idea that we should become something we are not right now...we put a pressure on ourselves to become that because we are not that thing which is identify with becoming NOW.
It is the mind that wants to see us change into something "better." But it is the soul that knows we are already something grand. And it is the soul that knows where it is going.
We often feel as if we want to be better...We want to become a better person, a better lover, a better father, a better business person, a better poet. And of course we can grow...we can become a "better" father, poet, etc...but we do not need to change aspects of who we are to become "better." We just need to become more of who we are. And to really do this, to become more of who you are...you need to accept yourself to a greater degree. And this has nothing to do with thought, but has everything to do with surrendering thought.
Surrendering thought (as it pertains to self judgment and analysis) would allow yourself to be who you are without all the pressures that the mind places on ourselves. For it is the mind, which has been conditioned through society, that states that we are "not good enough to become what we want to become so therefore we must change." What I am saying is that there is no need to change, nothing to fix...for you already are the grandest version of what you sense yourself to be. It is within you...and any pressure you put on yourself to become what you want to become only frustrates you in the process of becoming. For the process is happening whether we think it is or not. We are always moving into the light and out of the darkness of our own ignorance. So we might as well enjoy the process, enjoy the journey and the movement into the higher aspects of who we are.
We may trouble ourselves to become something we are currently not...for we want to become something "better"...but within that thought is already the sensation of nonacceptance. This is just a thought, and no, its not going to hinder our process of self-realization, the process of growing...but it is going to hinder our enjoyment of the process of becoming. Let me give you an example. Say we sense ourselves not being the best father we can be. Instead of agonizing over the past, troubling ourselves with a belief system that says you MUST change because you are NOT GOOD ENOUGH...we accept where we are, were we have come...and we simply become conscious of what it is we are becoming. For consciousness knows and witnesses the process, it does not judge it. When we are aware, when we are conscious of the self-realization process we realize that mind can only analyze. Yes it can help us see where we want to make changes, it can help us see how we may become a better father...but firstly it is the awareness of the sensations from within that move us to grow. Sensation and knowing precede understanding and thought. And when we realize that we are becoming, no matter what we think, we begin to surrender to the process and we seize to judge ourselves for not being what it is that we know we are to become in the "future."
Essentially, the future is now (for all there is, is NOW)...you may as well surrender to the fact that you are already becoming what you desire to become...for that is your soul journey...to move into the greatest and highest aspect of who you are. There is a great peace in this surrendering process...is there not?
Friday, April 1, 2011
When you are still, from the inside, witnessing the world around you becomes a profound experience. You hold no judgment on the world nor does it on you. For the stillness from within creates a platform for you too see things as they really are...as they really are beyond the surface of things...beyond someones anger, beyond someones sadness, beyond the chaos we see, and beyond the hatred. Because beyond everything is an everlasting desire to live (for all of us, however subjective this may be). The world is in the shape it is in today, because of the fear that drives peoples behaviors and thoughts. Yet beyond the fears is the thought of not having enough, not being able to secure what we desire...yet there is an everlasting drive within us though to simply live, to exist.
Often times, in this crazy world, we try to secure this desire to live out of fear, out of hoarding things, both physically and emotionally, on an individual and a collective level. Yet beyond all of this is the desire to live...the desire to exist...and when one is still one can see this...They can see that the pain, the sadness, the chaos, the stress, and the like, occurs because we all want something...and the thing we want is all the same. We want "goodness."
Goodness is subjective, of course, and what one deems good may be outright disturbing to you. Yet you can come to know where it comes from. For we all lead unique lives and have different backgrounds, yet we all are moved by the same principles. And in stillness we can see this without any negative judgment. We accept the way things are. And it is only through acceptance that the pains, the travails, and the like start to fade away. Can you imagine a world where we all simply accepted each other for what we were? If this happened would there be any reason for others to protect the things which we fear too lose (on physical, psychological, and emotional levels)? I think we can "sense" the answer to this...We do not need to think it, because would we not doubt world peace? Feeling honors it, thought may doubt it...
Stillness breeds Acceptance and Acceptance breeds stillness...for the two are of the same. What exactly is stillness then and how does one create it? Stillness is a subjective experience, yet there is something common among all those who share in that experience. There is a sense of profound unity. A unity within oneself, with everyone, and the all. This feeling may be subtle at first...and you actually may be confused...what does this even mean? This is bullshit, etc...But stop thinking and you may come to know what I mean. Just be aware...Simply witness (that is really all you have to do). Simply witness the world around you and the reactions within you. If the inner world seems to be reactionary, simply accept the inner process and let it be, let it slip away. Do not try to change it. For in declaration of trying to change something you claim to yourself that you are already incomplete. For your beauty is already within you. You are already what you desire you want to become. And in this acceptance stillness is born and thoughts simply slip away into a place where they do not affect you.
In the stillness we begin to feel what is...and what "is" is that everything is tied together, woven together in the matrix of this grand existence. And when one stops thinking for a moment, and steps out side the isolation of the ego they may begin to sense what it is that they are...
For we are awareness...we are an awareness that is accepting...and we are an awareness that is silent...for in our stillness we are awake and no longer alone. We feel this grand ecstasy of being alive and sharing this unique experience of life together with all those around you. In stillness there are no more strangers...there is only family...And is there not a sense of profound love in that!? It is a knowing that you are not alone, never were alone, and will never be alone! The sloth is as magnificent as the dolphin, the drug addict is as wonderful as the care taker...for down to the core of each and every one of us is the feeling of wanting to belong, wanting to be together, and not wanting to be alone. The drug addict may hide from their "thought driven" isolation through the use of drugs...and WE ALL defend in some way to ward off from the isolation that is created from the ego and the mind...Yet are we not also connected in our pain...connected in our desire to run, to be free, and to "escape" this existential burden that is created in the mind!?
We are free, we always were...maybe one day we will all realize this. And even if we do not we still have the opportunity to bask in this feeling, in this connection, and in this unity...for it is a choice...We may still be confined to the 9-5, still confined to certain social rules...yet the heart knows no boundaries...YOU ARE FREE! Just witness the constraints of the mind...Be Still, Be Alive...for you deserve it!
Much love and peace today...It is a glorious day.
Posted by Christopher Renzo at 9:45 AM